I am an artist, just because I say I am
My sister Marcie was the artist. I was the "A" student. I wanted to be an artist and would draw women’s faces with hair flowing over one eye. (I could draw one eye really well, but the other eye never matched, so I did a dramatic hair swoop to cover it.)
I took my first official art class in Jr. High. I wasn’t the best in the class. Everything I created Marcie could do “better" and I received my first and only "C". That put my artistic aspirations on hold for years. I would just stick to my lane and not explore. From that point on I only took classes because I was already good at the subject.
Many non-artistic years went by, then I decided I didn’t have to be the best to create. I could just kinda do something because I wanted to. It didn’t have to look like anyone else’s painting, or really like anything. It was just fun messing around with color.
It’s been therapeutic for me to put paint on canvas and mush it around with my fingers and turn the canvas and spray water and add more paint and just explore with color. I enjoy doing this now because I’m not worried about a grade or if I’m any good. I’ve taken down the barriers and limiting beliefs I had for myself. I don’t have to be the best. I can just be.
Comparison trapped me and Perfectionism kept me trapped.
I still like creating faces. And now I just do it for the JOY.
What’s keeping you trapped?